HBO’s “7 Days in Hell” airs this Saturday, July 11, at 10 PM ET/PT and whew, it’s not good. Starring Andy Samberg and “Game of Thrones” star Kit Harington as rival tennis players, the 45-minute special is a send up of the 2010 Wimbledon match between John Isner and Nicolas Mahut, which ran for three days. Bad boy American, Aaron Williams (Samberg) and British home favorite Charles Poole (Harington) battle it out over the course of seven days with interviews and vignettes spliced in-between each day’s play and with every passing minute it weighs heavier and heavier on your soul.
Williams is something of an Andre Agassi, tennis bad boy that falls on hard times after killing a linesman with an errant serve, while Poole is a dimwitted Brit who can hardly tie his own shoes. Everything from weather to sex with streakers, phone calls from the Queen of England, sex with streakers, a magical appearance from David Copperfield and sex with streakers plays a part in prolonging the match between the two as well as the resulting boredom.
Had this been boiled down to 20 minutes or even a five-minute “Saturday Night Live” sketch it might have been funny. In fact, as a seven-part “Saturday Night Live” sketch that ran over the course of an entire “SNL” season this might have been hilarious, which is why the trailer (see below) had moments of amusement, but the end result does not.
Appearing as themselves for commentary in-between are Jim Lampley, Chris Evert, John McEnroe, Soledad O’Brien and Serena Williams while Fred Armisen, Lena Dunham, Will Forte, Karen Gillan, Filip Hammar, Howie Mandel, Michael Sheen, Mary Steenburgen and June Squibb (as the Queen) appear throughout.
To be fair, McEnroe and Williams have a couple amusing moments early on, particularly the fact Aaron Williams was adopted by Serena’s father in something of a “reverse Blind Side“. Sheen is also comical as Caspian Wint, an inappropriate television host taking advantage of the dim-witted Charles Poole by asking him to lift his shirt as he spills cigarette ashes on his chest. Unfortunately, even that joke becomes played out as writer Murray Miller and director Jake Szymanski don’t seem to understand how comedy works. You can’t go to the well, over and over and over again, because suddenly what was once funny is not only no longer funny, it becomes boring, eliminating all fun you may have already had.
Even worse, the funny moments are all trailer moments, not a humorous part of the narrative, and the narrative couldn’t be any less compelling. I’m sure some will find “7 Days in Hell” immensely humorous, remembering only brief moments rather than the bigger picture. I think it says something when my wife and I sit down to watch this together and she can’t even tolerate the full 45 minutes, opting to leave the room rather than watch another minute. Out of my most esteemed professional duty I stood firm, watched all that remained and am none the better for it.
