From Steve Carr, the director of such comedy gold classics (sense the sarcasm please) as Rebound, Daddy Day Care and Dr. Dolittle 2 we get another crappy attempt at comedy with Are We Done Yet?. This film is so bad on so many levels it took me a minute to center myself and figure out exactly where I was going to start with this review. Unfortunately, I can’t place the blame on the director, we already knew what to expect from him. Nope it all falls on the shoulders of our lead actor who agreed to make this movie, one-time gangsta rapper named Ice Cube. Cube’s rap career was far from family friendly, yet he has somehow found himself in a watered down do-it-yourself film that even kids won’t be able to find enjoyment in. I never actually saw the first film in this Are We series, but after this debacle you couldn’t pay me to sit through it.
Cube stars as newly married Nick Persons and with his new family he does what any newly married guy with two step-children and twins on the way would do, he sells his business and decides to buy a huge fixer upper in the country. Sounds about right; four kids, no job and a house that needs to be fixed. Makes sense, don’t say it doesn’t. The kicker comes around when Nick finds out he was swindled when buying the house from rental agent Chuck Mitchell played by John C. McGinley who also happens to also be the town electrician and all-around-every man. Chuck conned Nick into buying the house knowing it was a little more than a “fixer upper” complete with electrical problems, dry rot and several other wallet draining necessities, all of which Chuck is willing to fix for a hefty fee. Basically, Chuck is a dick, but this is only half of Nick’s problems.
The other half of Nick’s problems is in fact Nick’s “other half” Suzanne played by Nia Long. She may look good, she isn’t the ideal wife. As Nick is trying to keep from spending all of his family’s savings on this new house he is also trying to launch a new magazine, but Suzanne doesn’t care a lick. She would rather just spend, spend, spend. She thinks Chuck is great; he is good with the kids and a great guy. Too bad he is just costing the family money and she can’t seem to see it! It gets worse from there but I will remain abridged.
Without giving you the entire story I will just say that a raccoon talks, Cube wrestles a fish and runs from a deer. There are fart jokes, plenty of falling down and a horrible attempt to guilt the audience into liking Chuck at the end that it is just pitiful.
Are We There Yet? was a surprise hit in 2005 bringing in $82 million at the box despite being critically panned, which causes me to lose a little bit of faith in the American public. However, if Are We Done Yet? manages to match its predecessor I may have to consider leaving the country for good. As one friend asked me already, “Who could have thought this was a good idea?” I can only answer, “I don’t know.” Even though I could trek on over to IMDb and find a complete list of producers, one of which is Cube himself, and place even further blame on the man. What up Cube? How about an N.W.A. reunion and we put this kiddy crap to bed? It’s just not you man.
