Prior to seeing Land of the Lost a couple of nights ago the conversation of the new Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie came up. A few people were discussing it and, like what I assume most Buffy and Joss Whedon fans are thinking, they weren’t too high on the idea. And while they were making perfectly legitimate arguments I had to ask, “Why do you care?”
In the past I have complained about remakes, most notably the upcoming Rod Lurie remake of Straw Dogs, but as time has gone on and the more I write about these upcoming remakes I begin to realize the remake train is never going to end so you may was well get onboard or just ignore them entirely. One thing I know to be true is complaining accomplishes nothing, especially into the limited world that is the Internet.
The latest proof the remake train can’t be stopped came in the form of news Columbia Pictures has set Kurt Wimmer to write a remake of the 1990 Arnold Schwarzenegger sci-fi actioner Total Recall as a contemporized adaptation of the science fiction saga based on the Philip K. Dick story “We Can Remember It for You Wholesale.”
Next is the latest news Dimension Films has tapped Dan Milano (“Robot Chicken”) to script Short Circuit, a remake of the 1986 pic. David Foster, who produced the original is back for the remake and tells Variety, “We’re bringing Number 5 into the 21st Century and taking advantage of the improvements in robotics that are so massive that robots are now performing heart surgeries in hospitals.”
A couple of others that were recently announced include Flight of the Navigator and The Neverending Story. We also have Conan, Cliffhanger, Videodrome, The Mechanic, Drop Dead Fred, Arthur and Barbarella and just yesterday we learned Taraji P. Henson has joined the remake of The Karate Kid and don’t forget about the remake of Footloose.
Does the idea of any of those movies getting (re)made piss you off? If you answered “Yes” I think that is perfectly reasonable, as I mentioned, I have been upset by the idea of remakes in the past. However, once you ask yourself “Why do I care?” I think you will begin to see it isn’t worth getting upset about.
So many people say they have fond memories of the original films or television shows being remade and don’t want the remakes to spoil their childhood memories. Seriously, childhood memories?
To go back to Flight of the Navigator and The Neverending Story, these are two films I loved as a child and my memory of Neverending Story is what prompted me to question the need for a new version. However, when I was writing up the story on Navigator and thought about treading the same waters I thought to myself, “When was the last time I watched Flight of the Navigator?” I couldn’t even remember, so why do I care if they remake it?
Back to those childhood memories, you still have them. A remake of one of your favorite films or television series does nothing to what you have already seen. Primarily because you don’t have to watch the remake, but that’s the sticking point isn’t it? I can already hear you, “It’s Buffy, what if it’s good?!??!”
What if it’s good indeed? However, are you really giving it a fair shot? I asked this to the Buffy fans and the idea Whedon wasn’t involved really irks them and they openly admitted they would most likely go into the film trying to like it as something new, but any changes would likely be highly scrutinized.
Of course, all the complaining that has happened to this point revolves around films that have been talked about but have not been made, or were remakes made from the films of another generation. It’s only now that Hollywood is really beginning to mine some of the films idolized by online film fans who grew up through the ’80s, which is why films such as The Karate Kid, Total Recall and The Neverending Story start to cut a little deep. For example, I didn’t see people up in arms when it was announced Paul Haggis was going to write and direct the thriller The Next Three Days, a remake of the French film Pour elle.
I am sure some of the more versed film fans may have had problems with remakes such as Ocean’s Eleven, All the King’s Men, The Pink Panther, Poseidon or Hairspray, but compared to the list of titles I mentioned earlier, these titles mean very little to the vocal online film fans. For the most part, the remakes this generation has experienced has been directed squarely at horror fans. In just the past few years we have seen Friday the 13th, The Hitcher, The Omen, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Prom Night, Halloween, The Hills Have Eyes, Dawn of the Dead, The Wicker Man and Last House on the Left. And that isn’t even mentioning the scores of remakes from overseas horrors including The Grudge, Quarantine and The Uninvited. Horror fans don’t seem as bothered by these remakes and seem a little more level-headed and wait to see what the film looks like before bashing it. The new A Nightmare on Elm Street remake has more-or-less been received with open arms and it is a classic horror if there ever was one.
It’s hard to figure out just how the assumed tidal wave of remakes will be received by audiences once they actually arrive in theaters, but for now it just seems silly to even care. After all, we still have the originals and if you love them so much you don’t have to go see the new versions. I also don’t think we have really hit on films worthy of complaining about. Should they try to remake Back to the Future one day or E.T. or Top Gun, then I expect the mood in the room to change a little bit, but I don’t see that happening just as I never expect them to attempt to remake Gone with the Wind or The Godfather, but considering they have talked about remaking Rashomon and Seven Samurai I guess I shouldn’t make any predictions that sound too bold.
