Brad has officially added Batman 3 to the RopeofSilicon database, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to get made, it just means hopes are getting high. Everyone and their mom wants Batman 3. Without a doubt I want it. Sooner the better. And ,of course, since The Dark Knight made a zillion dollars, there will be a third one within the next few years. No question on that happening. However, just because we demand another sequel doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the smart move to make one. So here’s just a few things – some serious, some not so – that should cause you to pause before whining about the wait for Batman 3.
Oh God, as soon as Batman 3 is announced, the Warner Bros. marketing department will murder the Internet with viral sites. Yes, they will literally choke the Internet to death by unleashing 200 billion sites – none of which will add any substance to the film. I don’t know about you, but I like the Internet, and don’t want it to die. How else will I get my porn?
I remember a time long, long ago when Sam Raimi wasn’t the guy who only directed Spider-Man movies. He was a geek idol, a horror-film madman with a fetish for zany camera movements and hell-bent on forcing his audiences to simultaneously laugh while vomiting. And he even shocked critics with the stone-cold masterpiece A Simple Plan. Yet, all he makes these days are Spider-Man flicks. I know I know, he just finished Drag Me to Hell (yay for going back to your roots), but then he signed up for Spider-Man 4 and Spider-Man 5, to be filmed back-to-back. What a waste.
Don’t get me wrong. I love that Warner Bros handed the Batman franchise over to Christopher Nolan. This guy is a brilliant director (with the exception of Following, all of his films have ended up on my Top 10 Lists). And that’s the problem. I want to see the films Nolan has up his sleeve not involving men playing dress-up. It was great he made The Prestige in-between Batman Begins and The Dark Knight. I only hope he does the same before Batman 3. Otherwise, he’ll risk following in Raimi’s footsteps.
Often a sequel is referendum on the previous film. For instance, just about everyone liked Batman Begins. However, it didn’t break any box-office records. Yet the millions who liked it told others about it and those people caught it on DVD or TV and liked it. And then when The Dark Knight opened, everyone wanted to see it in the theater because they really enjoyed the first one. And that translated into a smash-fest of box-office records. Then what normally happens is that people don’t like the sequel as much as the first one, and so they don’t flock to the third film. However, just about everybody loved The Dark Knight. So that means when part 3 opens, EVERYONE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD will skip work and see this film opening day. If you think the global economy is bad now, Batman 3 will vaporize it. Think about this. Nothing in the entire world will get done for one day, perhaps even 3 if it opens on a Wednesday and everyone sees it again during the following days. Companies will go bankrupt from the billions lost in work productivity. Utter chaos. However, the upside is that Warner Bros., the one company in the entire world left in business, will have a nice day at the stock market and pretty much own Earth afterwards.
