Box Office Oracle: Jan. 6 – Jan. 8


I got bamboozled with Narnia eeking out a narrow victory over King Kong. That’s what happens again this week in this dreadful month of slow releases.

1. The Chronicles of Narnia; The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe 19.3m
What if Narnia had just stuck with the British war in the 40’s theme? You know, cut out all the kid’s stuff. Sure it would have disgraced the memory of C.S. Lewis but what is Hollywood good for if not disgracing memories? That’s a lot of rhetorical questions for only one prediction.

2. King Kong 19.1m
Pass the grey poupon, it’s King Kong. Skull Island? Sounds like where I had my honeymoon. Zowie!

3. Grandma’s Boy 16.1m
The trailers look pitiful but everybody needs a laugh after seeing the Christmas credit card bills.

4. Hostel 13.1m
Here’s a prime example of why the Oracle only travels to five star hotels.

5. Munich 11.9m
Munich has had huge box office dollars per screen but I think that’s because it’s only opened in Jerusalem so far.

6. Fun with Dick and Jane 10.8m
Do I even need to make the porn title joke? It’s just right there isn’t it? Only a couple words away…

7. Blood Rayne 9.8m
I know this Blood Rayne film pretty well, it’s about Pandas, and I think it will be 7th.

8. Cheaper by the Dozen 2 9.3m
How could you even afford a dozen kids? It’s ludicrous.

9. Memoirs of a Geisha 6.4m
If I were a geisha you wouldn’t find me doing a tell all. I stick to the white make-up and silence and whatnot. You gotta respect tradition!

10. Rumor Has it 6.1m
I heard a rumor that I like cheese. Oh no wait, that’s a fact.

Check out Laremy’s movie book here.

Box Office

Weekend: Nov. 22, 2018, Nov. 25, 2018

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