After a disappointing edition of Thursday Night Football, it’s time to turn our attention over to the latest episode of The Rings of Power. We’re on Episode 6 which means there are only two more episodes remaining in the kickoff season.
So far, the series has been a glorious mixed bag. Initially, I was on board with the slow-burn pace and enjoyed meeting new characters and exploring new places within Middle-earth. Then the last few hours hit and while ROP continues to hit some marvelous high notes — visually speaking — the plot and characters haven’t developed as well as I’d hoped.
There’s also the intriguing mystery box about Sauron’s true identity. Is Halbrand the big bad? Is the Stranger the evil eye in the sky? Does it really matter?
I was in the bath having an internal debate about this very plot point the other day and came to this weird realization: Sauron’s reveal will be underwhelming no matter who it turns out to be. I mean, if he’s the Stranger, we’ll be like “Ah, that makes sense.” If it’s Halbrand, we’ll be like, “Well, saw that one coming.” And if it’s an entirely new character, we’ll be like “Lazy writing.”
Sauron’s true identity will only shock us if he turns out to be someone completely out of the blue, like, say, Galadriel or the Queen Regent — and that ain’t happening.
The point is that mystery boxes are difficult to pull off. Sure, they draw our attention on a weekly basis, but they rarely stick the landing in a satisfying way (see the new Star Wars trilogy or practically anything J.J. Abrams has ever done). Especially when it takes eight hours (or more) of our time.
Anyway, let’s start this episode and hope for the best!
What Happened in The Rings of Power Season 1 Episode 6
We open with Adar doing his best Maximus Decimus Meridius impersonation, sliding his fingers solemnly through dirt before the battle. He stands before a massive Orc army, gives a rousing speech, a couple of Namapt! chants and heads to the Ostirith watchtower where Arondir, Bronwyn, Theo, and a ragtag collection of worthless Southlanders await. Very Helm’s Deep of them.
Except, when the army arrives, they walk through the door and find … nothing. No humans. No Elves. That’s because Arondir is hiding in a crevice high above the Orcs, waiting to spring a trap. Our Elf warrior waits for the right moment — which just happens to be around the time Adar happens upon the Sauron mural — and leaps into action. He shoots a half-dozen Orcs and then uses a flaming arrow to pierce a device attached to the actual watchtower. Then he locks the gates and skedaddles as the structure falls and presumably kills the Orcs — and Waldreg — or at least traps them for a spell.
The Southlanders, including Bronwyn, watch the sequence of events from the safety of their cozy village a few clicks down the road. She is suddenly the de facto leader of this clan and instructs everyone to calm the f**k down and get to work. They must Home Alone their town if they want to stay alive.
We cut to the Númenórean ships and find Isildur happily performing stable duties. In fact, he just seems happy to be anywhere but Númenór. Who wouldn’t? That town was a slog. He heads outside and bumps into Galadriel, who apparently plans to stay in her armor throughout the entire voyage. “You have the look of your father,” she says to the young man during a casual conversation.
Isildur scoffs. “I was always told I look like my mom.”
“Listen you little sh—,” Galadriel starts before the sun rises and snags their attention. Isildur looks like he just found the prize at the bottom of the Lucky Charms box. Has he never seen the sun, or am I missing something?
Elendil arrives and kills the magic and tells the boy to get back to work.
“His mother, what was she like,” Galadriel asks, clearly interested in this topic.
Elendil rattles off a long poem or something before dropping this bomb: “She drowned.” Thanks for bringing that up. Galadriel sucks at small talk.
Later (unless there are two Elendils), Elendil gives the Queen Regent an update on the journey. “We’re still a few days away,” he says. “So, you don’t have to stay in your Queen attire or remain locked in your room, you know?”
“Tell the other ships to hurry up,” she snaps back.
“Were we not already going at top speed?”
Back in the Southlands, Arondir tries valiantly to break Sauron’s blade. “I got nothing,” he says before tucking it away. He plans to hide it from everyone, even Bronwyn.
Later, there’s one of those Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves montages where a meager army prepares for battle against a greater foe. They fortify the town, listen to some rousing Arondir and Bronwyn speeches and then … go back to fortifying the town.
Arondir and Bronwyn take a moment to do some heavy Elf-on-human flirting, which involves touching trees. The Elf promises to take Bronwyn away should they win this battle, which is probably not a good sign. (As a side: I know the Orcs hate the sun and all, but what if they just decided, F**k it, we’re attacking now! and destroyed the Southlands before the people had time to set their traps?)
Later that night, we get a repeat of the previous battle. The Orcs wander into town, find no one, and are ambushed. Except, this time, Arondir shoots his arrows from atop a house and Bronwyn uses flaming wagons to knock out a few of the snarling beasts. We do see Arondir engage in combat with a Terminator-like Orc who tosses him around like a rag doll. There’s a brutal ass moment when Arondir pulls a blade from the Orc’s eye and leaves a gaping wound that sprays dark blood all over his face. Gawd. Luckily, Bronwyn saves him from certain death … battle over, right?
Wrong! See, all the bad guys were just the men from the Southlands who joined the Orc army. “They had to pay the toll,” a dying Orc says. Eesh.
Growls cut through the darkness, followed by arrows. Bronwyn takes one in the chest. As does the cow guy from Episode 1. Arondir grabs his lady and carries her inside the pub. Luckily, the Orcs run in slow motion, so there’s plenty of time for our heroes to set up shop.
In fact, there’s time for Theo and Arondir to remove the arrow from Bronwyn as the remaining townsfolk watch and grimace. You’d think now would be the perfect time for the Orcs to attack … nah. Theo cauterizes his mum’s wounds and somehow this heals her completely.
Outside, the Orcs finally reach the front door. (Not to worry, Galadriel’s army is en route … we see them riding in broad daylight, though, which means they’re probably on the other side of the world.) Adar’s boys quickly subdue the townsfolk and proceed to stab the holy shit out of everyone in search of Sauron’s blade. Arondir and Theo stand their ground. More people are stabbed. Our heroes stay firm. Adar threatens Theo’s mom. Theo immediately pulls the blade out of the floor. “It’s right here.” (The dead townsfolk are like WTF?)
Finally, Adar gets Sauron’s sword. Before his group can do some wild Orc celebrating, Galadriel’s army somehow arrives in the nick of time. Also, it’s morning outside … I’m so confused.
The ensuing battle is brutal as hell. Our Elf gal does some nifty horse stunts and slices through Orcs like they were Battle Droids. Halbrand decapitates everything in sight. Isildur stabs a few dozen Orcs. Everyone saves everyone. Eventually, Adar hops on a horse and takes off. Galadriel takes off after Adar. Halbrand takes off after Galadriel. (All of this looks quite amazing, by the way.)
Somehow, Halbrand gets ahead of Adar, then uses a spear to trip the poor guy’s horse. The evil Elf falls to the ground. Halbrand grabs a spear and is about to cut him through — “You remember me?” he asks all cryptic-like.
“No?” Adar says.
Galadriel stops Halbrand mid-thrust. “One cannot satisfy thirst by drinking seawater,” she says. (But the sea is always right, right?)
Nearby, Isildur commends his pals on a job well done. “Wicked cool,” our young man says, high-fiving Valandil. “War is awesome.” Ontamo, on the other hand, thinks war sucks. “I’ve seen enough war to last me a lifetime.” Bruh, you were in a five-minute skirmish. Not exactly the kind of battle they write songs about, you know?
Inside a barn, Galadriel confronts Adar. “When I was young, I heard about Elves who were taken by Morgoth,” she says as he mopes next to a post. “You are one of them, are you not? A Son of the Dark?”
“Uruk,” he says. “We prefer Uruk.”
“Where’s Sauron,” she asks pointedly.
He scoffs, then dives into a tale. Apparently, after Morgoth’s defeat, Sauron decided to heal Middle-earth using supernatural powers. He head North with as many followers as he could muster, but something prevented him from achieving his goal — a shadow of dark knowledge the Dark Lord could never attain.
“He took my kids,” Adar says, referring to the Orcs. “So I split him open. I killed Sauron.”
Galadriel rolls her eyes, “Sure.”
Adar apparently just wants a home for his kids, all of whom have a beating heart, a name, and a right to a happy life. Oh no, they’re going to do to the Orcs what Disney did to the Sand People! I like Orcs more when they’re simple-minded rage animals, not actual characters capable of feeling. I mean, if they were actual beings with kids and families, capable of compassion — does that make Legolas a mass murderer?
“Your kind was a mistake made in mockery,” Galadriel says, clearly annoyed by the evil Elf’s smugness. “The scourge of your kind ends with you.”
“I see I’m not the only Elf alive who has been transformed by darkness,” he retorts.
She lunges with a knife but is stopped mid-thrust by Halbrand. “Seawater and shit,” he says. (At this point, I assume Halbrand is indeed Sauron; or, at least, the show wants us to think he’s Sauron. He is acting mighty strange. His interaction with Adar was quite telling. Maybe the pair had a fight that left Sauron broken and powerless, and completely unrecognizable?)
Moments later, Galadriel and Halbrand exchange pleasantries. Basically, they were both turned on by the other during battle. Before they can dig deeper, as it were, a rider arrives and orders them to return to the Queen to provide an update.
Nearby, Bronwyn (who magically recovered from ghastly wounds sustained mere hours earlier) speaks with the Queen Regent, who commends her for her bravery and leadership. “Yeah, this shit is tough,” Bronwyn agrees.
“Well, I got someone who can help you,” the Queen replies, nodding to Halbrand.
Bronwyn sees the beleaguered warrior, and eyes the symbol on his necklace. “Are you the King who was promised,” she asks. Everyone holds their breath. Halbrand eyes Galadriel who gives him a “You better not screw this up” look.
“I am,” he says. Nah, he’s gotta be Sauron.
All 20 Southlanders toast their new ruler. “That was really easy,” everyone says. Presumably, the series could end here. The good guys won, and the Southlanders have their King. It was a slow and often painful ride, but the final battle was cool and our heroes are happy. So, let’s call it a da—
Galadriel gives Sauron’s blade (confiscated from Adar) back to Arondir. The Elf then heads off to speak with Theo. The young man reveals that he felt immense strength with the sword in his hands, and felt its absence … kind of like a certain ring thing …
“Then let us be rid of it,” Arondir says, “once and for all!”
“How?”
“Give it to Númenor.” Arondir hands the blade (wrapped in a cloth) to Theo. The young man quickly unwraps the weapon and — gasp! It’s gone.
We cut to the watchtower where Waldreg uses the blade to quite literally open the floodgates.
Water spills through the tunnels created by Adar’s army. Geysers erupt. The ground shakes. Galadriel and Co. can only watch as the liquid rushes to a lonely mountain nearby and stokes the lava inside, producing a massive volcanic eruption that proceeds to destroy everything in sight. As everyone rushes for cover, Galadriel steps in front of a wall of ash and shuts her eyes.
Shit, this is gonna hurt, she thinks.
End.
Final Thoughts on The Rings of Power Season 1 Episode 6
So, after five hours of buildup, we finally got our first taste of Rings of Power action. Honestly, I was impressed. Visually, the relatively small battle looked great and was well staged, shot, and executed. Cool stunts, slick Elf action, and a lot of Orc brutality. Classic LOTR.
Obviously, this was just a tease of the larger war to come, but it got me excited. I mean, if the showrunners nail the epic battlefront, then I’ll happily wander through the forests of Middle-earth for three or four hours to arrive at the larger-than-life moments.
After this episode, I’m convinced more than ever that Halbrand is indeed Sauron. He clearly lost his power somehow and felt scorned by the likes of Adar and his “people.” I imagine he’s eyeballing Galadriel in the hopes she will join him in his latest venture to rule the world. Maybe he even sees himself as a good guy trying to do what he believes is right for Middle-earth. I don’t know.
So, who is the Stranger? How do Mithril, Elrond, and Celebrimbor fit into all of this? Will we ever see the titular Rings of Power? I guess will find out next week.
