Escape Plan is a dumb, but satisfying, theatrical equivalent to any recent direct-to-video actioner featuring above the line talent that used to be known for their star power. As for the film’s leads, I think it’s safe to say the “star power” of Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger‘s is looking quite dim as of late as I’m sure even they would admit Escape Plan is no substitute for the myriad of solid films these two churned out 20-30 years ago. It is, however, their aging personas that give audiences familiar with their classic work any reason to see this movie, as one slow motion shot of Arnold just before he lays waste to an onslaught of prison guards becomes the film’s signature moment.
Stallone plays Ray Breslin, a man with a certain set of skills, those being the ability to break out of any prison placed in front of him, a talent that has just awarded him and his team a $5 million contract. Breslin, as it turns out, actually wrote the book — as in the actual, physical book — on how to design a maximum security prison, but it seems all his knowledge is about to be used against him as his next assignment gets underway.
Almost immediately Breslin’s tracking chip is destroyed and his partners (50 Cent as a “techno thug” and Amy Ryan, because she probably had nothing better to do) have lost him. Breslin is on his own and a few flashes later, he’s locked away in a plexiglass cage at a privately owned, maximum security prison. The key to this place, however, is that it was designed by a man (James Caviezel) who keeps Breslin’s book handy at all times. That’s right, Breslin has become his own worst enemy!
Imprisoned under the name Portos, an assumed terrorist, Breslin eventually meets fellow inmate Emil Rottmayer (Schwarzenegger) and it isn’t long before he realizes not only is this prison damn near impossible to break out of, it seems he may not be supposed to… or is he?
This is actually where the story begins to fall apart and I’m not even sure I could adequately explain it as I’m still not entirely sure what actually happened. Suffice to say, the end goal remains escaping from the prison and we’ll leave it at that.
Escape Plan is essentially Stallone as “MacGyver”, using his vast knowledge (which is impossible to believe) to conjure up makeshift items such as sextants out of a pen, some eyeglasses and a rubber band. It’s all rather laughable, but I don’t think we’re ever meant to take this very seriously. I’m still not entirely sure why James Caviezel, as the hard-ass prison warden, was mounting butterflies while listening to a piano concerto, but I guess that’s what bad guys do to unwind?
To look for any measure of logic in this film, outside of ridiculous plotting and narrative-propelling momentum, is a waste. In this sense, director Mikael HÃ¥fström does a decent job keeping things moving while quickly steam-rolling over the more convoluted parts as I’m not even sure he, or writers Miles Chapman and Jason Keller could succinctly explain the overall plot.
Perhaps what was most interesting to me was the way the film rarely played up the idea we were watching a movie starring Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Not only that, while the two have starred alongside one another in The Expendables franchise, this is the first time they have really been together the entire time and it’s a situation where it could have gotten bogged down in Stallone and Schwarzenegger “moments” — “I’ll be back”, “Why don’t you try knocking me down now?” or “Get to the choppa!” None of that. Instead, they play on their iconic film personalities, Schwarzenegger much more than Stallone, the latter of which is still pretty much just a slurring thug, running around mean-mugging folks, but it works well enough and, I guess, is pretty much the cinematic personality he’s known for.
Schwarzenegger, though, is lighthearted for much of the time and gets off a few solid one-liners. He has a great little scene opposite some heat lamps while in solitary and then there’s the slow-motion mowing down of the bad guys that caps the whole thing off.
No, Escape Plan isn’t good in the sense I would immediately urge you to run out and see it, but as a matinee diversion and certainly as an at home rental it will more than satisfy anyone that looks at the marketing and is fully aware of what they’re in for. In fact, while the end result is rather average, I expect most people will come away saying they had quite a bit of fun with it.
