2013 Oscars Live Blog: Update Winners and Live Commentary!

[3:57:27 PM] Laremy says: I welcome you to page two, like a boss.

[3:59:16 PM] Brad says: Laremy is ordering more food… He refers to himself as “Larry” when he does this because people don’t know what a Laremy is… It threw me off the first time he did that.

[4:00:56 PM] Laremy says: When I say “Laremy” it causes mass confusion, so I just avoid it.

[4:01:27 PM] Brad says: Kristin Chenoweth is always so happy!

[4:02:13 PM] Laremy says: Oh, mandatory book plug: If y’all want to buy or review I would take that sort of thing. Evidently my Amazon overlords like reviews.

[4:02:28 PM] Brad says: It’s a Destiny’s Child singer! Perfect! Pay those automo-bills.

[4:02:33 PM] Laremy says: Destiny’s Child is back together! Now where’s Vanilla Ice? Get Ice on the phone!

[4:03:21 PM] Laremy says: I’m not a fashion expert but Kristin Chenoweth looks like a paint can exploded.

[4:03:35 PM] Brad says: Catherine Zeta-Jones is about to kill someone unless she’s invited for an interview NOW! Then the camera pans so we can no longer see her.

[4:04:13 PM] Brad says: Just once someone needs to say, “What the hell are you wearing?”

[4:05:02 PM] Laremy says: Jessica Chastain is wife material. I could see her becoming really obsessed with me.

[4:05:19 PM] Brad says: Tweet your fashion favorites people! #Bestdressed

[4:06:05 PM] Brad says: Just got a press release in the ol’ Inbox. Deleted it. If you’re sending a press release during the Oscars you clearly aren’t targeting my audience.

[4:06:24 PM] Laremy says: I have to take a break at 4:20pm to go get the chicken. Plan accordingly, and smoke ’em if you got ’em.

[4:06:33 PM] Laremy says: Don’t worry, B-Luv will still be here.

[4:06:40 PM] Brad says: I love how Kelly Rowlands manages to interview people and still keeps that leg visible. She is killing it! #telephonebills

[4:06:58 PM] Laremy says: How are we watching a SECOND C-Tates interview? Let the man get inside and get his drink on!

[4:07:54 PM] Brad says: Just saw Charlize Theron, she still has her short hair from filming Mad Max: Fury Road.

[4:08:07 PM] Laremy says: Zack Sparrow is crushing it in the comment section. #justsaid

[4:10:12 PM] Laremy says: Brad just told me “time is relative” and I said “I can’t argue that”. We’re finding common ground around here.

[4:11:06 PM] Laremy says: Amanda Seyfried just admitted her dress is painful. There’s a look inside the Matrix for ya.

[4:11:10 PM] Brad says: Amanda Seyfried just said her organs are slowly being pushed out of her body and that she can’t sit down. Chenoweth suggested she keep her organs in. That’s the kind of advice you get on the Oscar red carpet.

[4:12:38 PM] Brad says: Kristin Chenoweth is high. Amanda Seyfried was baffled at why she is so happy.

[4:14:57 PM] Brad says: We are pausing for a fashion montage. I think this is targeted directly at Laremy and his ilk.

[4:15:12 PM] Laremy says: I wonder what name Quvenzhane Wallis gives at Starbucks. My guess is “Mini-Q”.

[4:16:39 PM] Brad says: Jennifer Lawrence is approximately two feet taller than Kristin. She tells us she’s 5’8″, Chenoweth is 4’11”. Facts!

[4:17:17 PM] Brad says: I think this would be better if instead of a microphone, Kristin Chenoweth was holding a giant lollipop.

[4:17:55 PM] Laremy says: Right now I have carb brain. It’s like temporarily being Johnny Depp.

[4:20:08 PM] Brad says: Larry is off to get more food. So don’t expect any comments from Laremy for a few minutes. In fact, let’s all take a 5 minute break.

[4:21:15 PM] Brad says: Just kidding! Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas are getting interviewed now. All is right with the world.

[4:22:02 PM] Brad says: It’s Daniel Radcliffe and it looks like this interview is taking place on the street.

[4:25:07 PM] Brad says: When the Lara person says to Liev Schreiber that he hopes he makes his night with Naomi Watts a “date night” tonight what does that mean? Is that suggesting a little late night naughtiness? I mean, they are going to the Oscars and she is the nominee. I’m confused.

[4:26:19 PM] Brad says: Okay, I haven’t seen Anne Hathaway yet, but people don’t seem to be impressed by her attire. Is it that bad?

[4:26:57 PM] Brad says: Okay, just saw it. It’s pink and… pointy?

[4:27:55 PM] Brad says: Commercial for a Royal Caribbean cruise, that’s an industry that can’t be booming at the moment right?

[4:29:40 PM] Laremy says: I’m back!

[4:30:13 PM] Laremy says: I would have been here quicker but the dude ahead of me in line had a LOT of questions about how Chinese food worked.

[4:31:09 PM] Brad says: We are an hour away from the start of the show. I loved seeing Chenoweth handing it off to Lara and raising her arms in confusion. Behind the scenes greatness.

[4:31:10 PM] Laremy says: Anyone have a theory as to why Brad is wearing a nautical themed pashmina afghan?

[4:33:53 PM] Laremy says: Wow, CinemaScore commenting all the way from Sydney, Australia. That’s dedication!

[4:36:42 PM] Laremy says: When Life of Pi wins for Best Visual Effects does Andy Serkis get to give a speech too?

[4:38:00 PM] Brad says: I am not feeling nearly as fatigued with this live blog as I normally am with the Golden Globes and SAGs… Probably because I know this is only about movies and no wasting time with TV awards.

[4:38:43 PM] Brad says: Bradley Cooper’s mom is rocking a puffy pink jacket. Laremy called it “So fab!”

[4:41:19 PM] Brad says: Nicole Kidman is married to Keith Urban. They are at the Oscars together. More facts.

[4:41:44 PM] Laremy says: Keith Urban is the least urban person possible.

[4:42:50 PM] Brad says: Charlize Theron is towering over Jess Cagle. By the way, do a Google search for “editor in chief entertainment weekly” and see what Gawker has to say about Mr. Cagle.

[4:48:10 PM] Brad says: It seems like the people on Twitter watching the E! red carpet are seeing more craziness than we are on ABC… In this instance I’m cool settling for inanity than the stupidity of E!

[4:48:14 PM] Laremy says: One hour and counting until the give the first little golden man away. And it’s a good one too, Best Supporting Actor. I’m instantly regretting my Philip Seymour Hoffman pick because I just heard he didn’t campaign. Like, at all. #NotGood #OforOne

[4:50:03 PM] Brad says: Some guy just made something with toothpicks… it was a Mutual of Omaha commercial. Do the math!

[4:51:00 PM] Laremy says: I liked Kristin Chenoweth much more before this pre-show.

[4:52:19 PM] Laremy says: I know what’s in the mystery box. It’s the cruise ship from Speed 2.

[4:53:16 PM] Brad says: Robert De Niro’s Day: Wake Up. Go to Oscars. Done.

[4:53:56 PM] Laremy says: He doesn’t even feign enthusiasm anymore. It’s sort of adorable.

[4:55:34 PM] Brad says: Daniel Radcliffe never breaks character. Amazing!

[4:55:42 PM] Laremy says: I ate so much chicken.

[4:58:40 PM] Laremy says: The Baconator should require a background check.

[5:00:58 PM] Brad says: Okay, it’s time for another page break… get ready to click on move to page three!

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