Yet, with the arrival of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 I seemed unprepared for the first 115 minutes of the final chapter in a franchise that seemed uninterested in capturing the attention of new audiences:
I can’t judge the Twilight movies the same way I judge other movies any longer. There is just no way I can give them that kind of respect. They are not movies and this, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1, is even less than half of a movie. This first part of the final chapter in the Twilight Saga is an idea for, at most, 30 minutes of a film. Never before have I seen a movie in which the editing process was ignored to the point we get a dramatic closing of a trash can lid as this sleeping exercise lasts almost two hours.
I ended my review with:
Watching Bella and Edward play chess isn’t entertaining and laughing as he avoids her because he’s scared of hurting her whilst in the throes of sexual passion is only funny for so long. It’s one thing to be a bad film, but to be this boring at the same time is just insulting.
And so here we are. For me, it all comes to an end tonight, but my screening is only the beginning as marathon screenings of the first four Twilight films are scheduled for Thurdsay, ahead of the midnight screenings of Breaking Dawn – Part 2 where fans will be able to find out what comes of their beloved vampires and werewolves.
To go by my reviews over the last four years, it’s a franchise that’s gone from “grin and bear it” to “insulting”, can this final chapter serve as some form of redemption? Amazingly enough… the possibility is there.
For four films now we’ve watched as Edward was afraid to touch Bella, but finally he gave in with a scene of headboard-smashing sex. He ravaged Bella’s puny human body, bruising her from head to toe and implanting his vampire seed in her womb. The baby grew at a rapid pace, sucking the life out of Bella to the point Edward had to literally suck the life out of Bella. Gnawing on her womb and removing the baby from her belly, a withered Bella faded into darkness, but death was only the beginning for the lovestruck human.
Now Bella is a vampire, the days of longing and desire are finally over. They are married and allowed to participate in whatever kinky bedroom behavior they so desire as Jacob falls in love imprints on their newborn baby and the Volturi are coming to kill them, or take the baby or whatever is to come…
It took 493 filmed minutes for Edward and Bella to get together and now we can move to the final 115 minutes of their on screen lives.
It’s amazing it took this long for the hope I had at the end of the first installment in the franchise to come to fruition, but perhaps Breaking Dawn – Part 2 can finally offer a second chapter to a story with the longest cinematic first chapter in history.
