Review: Hemlock Grove Season 2 Offers Nothing New or Fun to Chew On

Now, it’s back for a second season, which Netflix is making available to stream in its entirety at midnight on Friday, July 11th. Having seen more than half of the season’s 10 episodes, it’s frustrating to report that it is basically the exact same show. In fact, season 2 is probably a little worse than its predecessor. It repeats the little that worked in season 1, and what is new is painfully dull. What was true last season remains even more so: While it contains elements familiar to the horror genre, this is not horror. It is a soap opera with occasional gore.

The first episode opens with a masked individual killing a family by blowing up their house. The masked killer is the season’s main villain, at least in the episodes made available for preview. The problem, one that plagues all of the show’s storylines, is that it is treated so indifferently. It comes and goes randomly, and very little effort is put into it. The mask is familiar and the entire masked killer angle feels like an afterthought. But more on that later.

As for the main players, Peter (Landon Liboiron) has left Hemlock Grove and is with family in Ohio. Roman (Bill Skarsgård), just back from a Hawaiian vacation, is leading the Godfrey Corporation. Olivia (Famke Janssen) is being kept alive by the shady Johann (Joel de la Fuente). Norman (Dougray Scott) is still mourning for his daughter.

Peter is forced to return to Hemlock Grove after his mother, Linda (Lili Taylor), is arrested and transferred there to face trial. He goes to Roman for money to pay a lawyer, but the door is slammed in his face. Roman is livid with Peter for bailing when things got tough. Of course, they won’t be enemies for long, thanks to someone new to town. That someone is the beautiful Miranda (Madeline Brewer), who gets stuck in Hemlock Grove after fleeing an abusive relationship. Peter helps her out with car troubles while Roman provides shelter. Her main role is to be nude as much as possible.

Meanwhile, Peter and Roman are having the same vivid dreams. They see the masked killer in them, and they are determined to do something about it. This pops up now and again, but very infrequently. Mainly, Hemlock Grove meanders. There are so many characters (some haven’t been mentioned), and it just plods along from one storyline to next. Entire scenes often feel pointless and go nowhere. Roman buys a horse. Olivia sings karaoke. And so on. There’s no sense of urgency, no sense of dramatic direction, no real suspense or mystery.

A whole lot feels leftover from last season, too, especially pertaining to Johann and the Godfrey Corporation. Roman wants to know more about secretive R&D going on. There’s a lot of cryptic talk about it and vague references to it. There are brief glimpses of odd research taking place. But all of this transpired in season 1. Not much new is added. It’s a retread and it’s boring. Peter’s transformation is back as well. It’s impressive but it feels desperate. “See, remember this? Isn’t it cool?” Yes, yes it is, but we saw the exact same scene last season. It’s an old trick and the show doesn’t have any new ones.

When it appears to attempt something truly daring, it turns out to be a dream of course, forgotten immediately. Binge-watching this show is an exercise in futility. You keep waiting for something remotely interesting to happen, and then you wait some more. One episode blends into another, and you can barely remember which number you’re on, nor do you much care. There’s no momentum, nothing viewers are really invested in. Just a lot of small-town melodrama (and the most unintentionally hilarious scene involving breast feeding you’re likely to ever see). Hemlock Grove is a dud. With so much quality horror on TV these days, your time is better spent with any number of other shows.

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