Fox Tackles ‘Roller Coaster Tycoon’

On the heels of the announcement that 20th Century Fox scooped up the feature film rights to Electronic Arts’ “The SIMS” we now learn that they are also set to give the feature film treatment to Atari’s “Roller Coaster Tycoon” with sights already set on franchise possibilities since there are already three editions of the game including deluxe and gold editions.

Fox studio head Tom Rothman said in a press conference today, “‘Roller Coaster Tycoon’ is one of the most addictive games ever created and we aim to bring that addiction to the big screen.” He continued, “Audiences will witness the creation of an entire roller coaster as the builders encounter bad weather that keeps attendance down and guests that get lost or complain because there aren’t enough restaurants or rest rooms. It will be the most unique movie experience ever! Who doesn’t want to build a roller coaster?”

Bottoms Up scribe Erik MacArthur is aboard to pen the script, but plot details are being kept extremely secret even though we have learned that the journey may take the production to the pyramids of Egypt and the frigid temperatures of the Antarctic as they hope to also cash in on the recent penguin craze.

Neill Blomkamp is aboard to direct as his schedule opened up when the production of the videogame adaptation of Halo fell through.

Roller Coaster Tycoon is currently slated for a May 18, 2015 release. The reason for the long delay is due to the high cost of set designs and Fox’s desire to lock in a release date and make sure other studios stay clear.

“Waiting until 2015 to release ‘RCT’ will ensure we do it right and make the greatest roller coaster building movie possible even though it will be 100% CGI and not a real roller coaster,” Rothman said.

NOTE: This, of course, is a satirical article and none of it is true. It is simply meant to prove that Hollywood has completely run out of ideas with the news that “The SIMS” is being adapted into a movie. Someone stop the insanity.

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