How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack

Release date: TBD

Studio: N/A

Director:

MPAA Rating: N/A

Screenwriters: ,

Starring:

Genre: Comedy, Fantasy

Duration: N/A

Copyright Holder: N/A

Copyright: N/A

Plot Summary:

Robert Zemeckis will adapt the humorous defensive manual, "How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack," based on the book by Chuck Sambuchino. "How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack" is the only comprehensive survival guide that will help you 1) prevent, 2) prepare for, and 3) ward off an imminent home invasion by the common garden gnome. Once thought of as harmless yard decorations, evidence is mounting that these smiling lawn statues are poised and ready to wreck havoc. The danger is real. And it's here. As a certified Garden Gnome Defense Expert (GGDE accreditation, University of Phoenix), I have developed a proven system—Assess, Protect, Defend, Apply—for safeguarding property, possessions, and loved ones. Strategies include step-by-step instructions for gnome-proofing the average dwelling, recognizing and interpreting the signs of a gathering hoard, and—in the event that a secured perimeter is breached—confronting and combating the attackers at close range.

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